I have a blog?

So anyway, 2 months later.

Seems like all my update are 240 characters or fewer on facebook. It also feels less like I'm talking to myself over there.

Planning for a trip to France. We're still in the early stages of where to go and what to see and all that. And don't even bring up where we're going to sleep, because I'll probably start crying.

And we'll see MIL, which will be great. It remains to be seen exactly when and if she will then decamp to Germany and when that will be and so on.

And geez, too many details. Right now, I'm focused on finding rolling backpacks for the kidlets. Maybe for me, too. We'll require them to carry a good portion of their own stuff that way. I don't know if that will be a hindrance or a help. When they're too tired to go another step or when DD is sleeping in the stroller or.... whatever.

But we have plane tickets and a hotel reservation (with park and fly paid for most of the time) in San Francisco. Yeah, 3+ hours just to get to the airport. Saved us $500 PER PERSON, though....

And to all a gooooood night!

I tried. I did.

Most of the things on the boys' lists were either expensive ($250 Lego set?) or no-gos (a cell phone? You're 10. And you never make calls) or just not happening (pet).

So I found stuff they would like, not necessarily what they asked for.

I was also trying to get out a bit cheaper than usual - though I don't spend all THAT much any year.

So DS2 didn't like anything. At all. The remote control car he wanted - because his cars and only his cars never work right - DH got him an RC helicopter that is mostly uncontrollable. He got one, small lego set because I thought someone else was getting a big one for the two of them to share. He had already read one of the books (though he will likely want to read it again!). He liked the bathrobe until I went to take a picture of him in it. So, of course, the boring stuff like clothes were an affront and an offense.

DS1 was happier, but then, he got three small lego sets.

DD is pretty happy all around. She's easily pleased and we did get her stuff that we knew would please her.

I got some cool stuff and some chocolate. Woohoo! I'm waitin' and hopin' that my present from my brother was a couple of books that don't come out until the 28th.

DH didn't get a whole lot. He never tells us what he wants and then the slippers allegedly in his size don't fit him.

I'm trying to talk DH into the pet still. I think a cat or two would be great.

NaNoWriMo - 50K and counting!

Two days ago, I wrote my 50,000th word toward a new novel. It was only the 14th, but I was really flying, with my characters thought about and my outline done.

So, big celebration! Woohooooooo!

I think I'm 3/4ths of the way through and since I hit 50K, I've been... well.... not writing.

OK, so I spent some time with the toddler today when I would usually have been trying to concentrate. I picked up the dang toys from all over the room that I'm working in (we have a LOT of toys). I read and commented on some chapters for my critique partner and have started revising a draft that she commented on for me (and realized that I managed to give her an older version - which I can't even find in my computer now, so where did THAT come from???)

I also have to get on DS1's case more, because he's way, way behind in the home practice for his karate black belt. Way. Way. Way.

And then, my characters have to spend another week in a carriage and go to the Paris region, where they have to find out if Helene's family are the ones who are trying to kill her. (SPOILER: They're not, really, but they're the key. And it wouldn't really bother them if she croaked)

Sunday rambles

So far today:

I've spent far too much time hoping someone would post something funny on facebook.

I printed out Raley's coupons and went grocery shopping. With sales and coupons, I saved a lot of money, but still was well over $50, which is the cutoff for getting 50 cents off per gallon at their gas station. The Toddler behaved as she ran around in a Christmas sweater and charmed people.

We got two fairly large "ponkins" at $1 each (coupon!) and then paid whatever per pound for a smaller white one. I'll probably still take them to a pumpkin patch next week when they have half days due to conferences. Maybe even Apple Hill?

There's a neighbor across the way cutting with a chainsaw. I might take my computer and move someplace quieter, ie not right by the front window.

They are predicting a little rain for this afternoon. It looks, feels, and smells like it and there are already a few little sprinkles.

I'm getting excited for NaNoWriMo. I have an outline that I want to read over and add some things to. I'm also reading a book about Louis XIV and might even get to Mme de Sevigné's letters. Maybe. I got distracted yesterday by a contemporary romance by Jill Shalvis that I bought when it first came out about 3 weeks ago and which has been langushing, unread, until now. I also went through my library requests and put a freeze on everything that I could that's not a movie for the kids, etc. I'm already returning more books than I read these days.

We just had grilled cheese for lunch. "Grilled" in the sense of toasted under the broiler, because the Brits call that the grill. See? At least I amuse myself, right?

Peepee and poopoo in the potty sometimes seems like the biggest moment of the day, you know? Toddler's, not mine...

Snowboarding, DUDE.

I took all three kids up to the snow with the intention of letting the boys try snowboarding.

Well, I forgot my camera when we went to the snow. I was going to buy a disposable one, but ended up never thinking of it anywhere that I could get one. I'm just organized that way, I guess.

It's supposed to be about a two hour drive. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

So we drove up on Tuesday in a snow storm. It was crazy. And it cost me double the price for tire chains because I was buying them almost up to the snow line during a snow storm. Then it cost me $30 for the guy in a yellow jumpsuit to put them on at the side of the road. But they work, so fine.

It was insane. Totally insane. If I hadn't had hotel reservations, I would have turned around and tried again the next day. With all the stops and the slow going, it took almost 4 hours.

We checked into the hotel that afternoon and relaxed for a bit and then went out for a walk and threw snowballs at each other (there was about a foot of fine powder). Then i got DD to sleep and let the boys go to the sauna by themselves for a bit. No hot tub, which they would have liked better, but hey, now they've tried it.

We went out for pizza that night and by bedtime, DD was throwing a screaming tantrum so we all went to bed early. I was awake half the night for no apparent reason - I fell asleep and then woke up at 1:30 then was awake until almost 5. Yeah, it stunk.

So the next morning, there was another foot or more of snow everywhere, so we cleaned off the car and set out for the ski place, only to discover that the road between the side of Donner Lake and Donner Ski Ranch was closed. So the hotel I chose because it was 3 miles from the mountain? Yeah, not so great. So I drove out to the highway and made the loop back to the next exit and it turned out to be the wrong exit and we drove aimlessly and finally went and got bagels in Truckee and then back to the hotel to call the Ski Ranch how the h*** to find them. I had to go one MORE exit back, making it a 12+ mile loop instead of the intended 3 miles.

So we got there a bit after 11 to discover that all the lessons at 12:30 were full. Since I have no clue as to snowboarding, we then bought lunch in the overpriced greasy cafeteria and sat around until the 2:00 lesson. It turned out to be a good choice anyway, because there were only 2 or 3 other kids in their lesson group and 2 instructors. They went down the smaller hill 4 or 5 times with the lesson and then DS1 had enough. DS2 went down a couple more time and then we turned in their rented gear and called it a day.

DD and I wandered around the restaurant/lounge area and got snacks and put her snow pants and coat on and off and on and off to go out and back in and out and back in.

The roads were basically dry by then, though the pass road was still closed, so I went around by the highway with the chains still on, which is not a good idea with everyone else going 65. DS2 and I got them off when we got back to the hotel.

We ordered in pizza. Mmmmm pizza! And went to bed sort of early.

Thursday morning, we packed up and left - the pass road was finally open, so we made good time on the little, twisting road with steep rock faces covered with snow. No habitation or businesses along there, so they saved it for last, I guess.

DS1 didn't want to snowboard again and didn't want to ski, so I signed DS2 up for lessons and rented his gear and he went down the slope alone a couple of times. I got them hot chocolate and he drank it quickly before his 10:30 lesson.

DD and DS1 and I wandered around the restaurant/lounge area and got snacks and put her snow pants and coat on and off and on and off to go out and back in and out and back in. DS1 took DS2's scarf thing out to him part of the way through the lesson and helped him out it on. What a nice big brother. There were a lot more people there the second day and it was packed, so less amusing than when it was a little more open.

It was a lot colder on Thursday and had started to snow again, so when the lesson was over, I got him another cup of chocolate. He looked so completely tired and I couldn't stomach eating expensive grease again, so we left. He cried and cried.

Oh, did you notice something? I forgot to check out of the hotel and my pay-as-you-go phone was out of money, so DS1 and DD and I drove back to the hotel and checked out and then came back. Probably illegal to leave a seven year-old behind even for that half an hour and even though he was supervised in his lesson.

So the roads were wet, but not yet snowy again, though snow was coming down and blowing like crazy even down below 4000 feet. And my wiper fluid nozzles had frozen up, so i couldn't get the windshield clean from the spray from other cars. Yet another driving delight!

We stopped for McDonald's halfway back, just below the snow. DS2 was still mad at me and wouldn't get out of the car, so we got our food to go.

We did make really good time, though: just over 2 hours.

And boy, I'm still totally wiped out, 24 hours after we got home.

PICTURES from an exhibitionist.

It's that time of year when the turkeys' faces exhibit their, uh, prowess.



Do I look maniacal enough? Like I'm going to eat her braiiiiinzzzz.



My knight in shining armor.



Ah, so that's what wiffle balls and white board pens are for.



Princess ready for soccer.

Post #998 - closing in on 1,000 posts

Only took me more than 3 years. Well, that's a bit less than one post a day, so I guess it's neither wimpy nor excessive.

Rough day today.

I tweaked a nerve in my back last night just stretching and so didn't sleep well and woke up even stiffer this morning, one shoulder higher than the other and unable to turn my head very far to the left. I felt a twinge under my right shoulder blade every time I moved my right arm.

So The Toddler caused me to spend almost 5 minutes changing her diaper and I yelled, so DH got up - bloody miracle, really - and I ended up leaving her here while I drove the boys to school. I don't have to look over my left shoulder too much on the way there, but managed it, then called my chiropractor as soon as I dropped them off. He told me he'd be in his office at 10 anyway to do paperwork and to come in.

So I come home and soon get a snotty, sarcastic call asking where I am because there's a field trip. Uh, we filled out those forms 2 months ago, right? Would you mind giving us a head's up the day before? My fault that I didn't have it written down, but I usually write that I'll drive if they need me, because all I have is a small car and I can't attend half of the actual events because I'll have the toddler in tow.

So I go to the chiro and we catch up and he tries to make my legs the same length again and then improves my mobility in my upper back with the pop heard around the world.

So I come home and there's a message from my sister that my dad is in the hospital again because he fainted again, just like he did last year.

So I talked to my sister and my mom. And we still don't really know why, so he's having more tests and at least it's not a blood clot or something from his knee surgery a week or so ago.

And DH tells me he won't be home until extremely late because there's this monthly meeting he goes to.

So I finally get DD down for a happy nap and finally lie down with my neck on a rolled-up towel and an ice pack under my upper back like I was supposed to do 2 hours before.

Oh, and I've been comfort eating. A lot.

And then I forgot DS1's karate gear so he'll have to go tomorrow.

And then pretty soon the boys are screaming and wrestling and running and fighting and I told them to get off of my bed and out of my room about 5 times and they were still szcreeching and kicking and rolling around and yeah, I totally lost my rag.

And then DS2 was totally not even trying to read what he needed to do for his spelling homework. And now instead of doing his math, he's bouncing a ball off the wall.

And did I mention that I have PMS?

bikes!

I've been asking DH to take the boys out to the school nearby and practice riding their bikes without training wheels. So a couple of hours after DH finally rolled out of bed this AFTERNOON (when is my lie-in?), I tried to kick them all out. By then, the Toddler was up from her nap and wanted to go, too. I figured that someone would need to watch her while someone else watched the boys ride, so it was a whole-family thing instead of me getting a break.

So the boys walked their bikes all the way down there and tried a bit and tried some more. DH held them up a bit, but mostly just let them go.

DS1 (the one who just turned 10) keeps hitting the brakes and putting his feet down and his knees flail out wide and so on. He was doing pretty well, but then wasn't getting anywhere at all, so he finally took a break and when he went back to it, he could go the length of the parking lot, including bumping over the speed bump.

DS2 (who is 7 1/2) tends to put his feet down as well and swerve all over the place, but he just kept going and going and managed to do the length of the parking lot a few times, including once where he went down and did a slow circle and came back. Wow!

They (and I) didn't feel confident enough in their abilities to keep going in a straight line or to go uphill for them to ride their bikes home, so we walked back.

So the Toddler had fun flinging herself down the slides in the Kindergarten play area and the boys are getting the hang of it. I'm trying to think of a safe place for them to ride tomorrow when that school we were practicing at starts up and we're still on vacation. DS1's bike doesn't really fit in the trunk - even if it did, I don't think both bikes would fit, anyway.

And yes, it was nice going for a walk with them. I had already done a good bit of writing and passed the 90K mark. A character caught the flu, which I hadn't planned on. Not that people generally plan to catch the flu, but you know...

spoons and Christmas stuff

I was showing my kids how to hang spoons from their nose after dinner. Made me think of a certain high school friend who could hang one each from nose, chin, and each cheekbone. I hope I have a pic of that somewhere....

I was tempted to pick a kid and take him out shopping for his brother today, but stopped myself before doing something horribly stupid like going to Toys ya Us on the Saturday before Xmas.

I need to send a package to Ohio and one to Louisiana. The one to Ohio should be going Monday. The one to Louisiana needs a bit more in it...

Hey Mom, there are 2 packages from amazon coming your way for Dad and Chen. Well, one says it has shipped, but the other hasn't and I don't know why they weren't shipped together, but am guessing they're from 2 different warehouses. I was too cheap to have amazon wrap them. I am so not good with the whole presentation thing.

And shoving DH out the door with boys to force them to get me presents. Yeah, I am a tad greedy, but find Xmas depressing if no one I actually live with gets me anything.

Oh, and a Secret Santa gift for me arrived in the mail today. Woot!

And then I think we're all set. Some cookie baking to do this week and loads and loads of wrapping.

And of course

A moment of silence for the lives lost on Sept 11, 2001.

We lived in London and I was at the park with DS1 who was about 1 1/2. I overheard someone on a cell phone saying something about people jumping from buildings on Wall Street and was confused. When I got home, the phone was ri nging and it was my MIL asking what I thought and I said I didn't know.

I went and tuned the TV on and watched the towers collapse.

We lived a mile or so North of the Thames, which is one of the main flight paths for the approach to Heathrow. We could go out to the park and watch - and hear the roar - the Concorde land. For the next week or so, they diverted the air traffic over our house and then had it make a sharp right at the river for the rest of the approach so that they didn't have 100 planes a day flying over Parliament.

An English friend's husband worked as something financial in an insurance company and they lost just about everyone from their New York office. An American friend was in the airport in Portland, Maine and saw the terrorists - made eye contact with Mohammed Atta who looked pretty angry - before they got on their planes. The same friend lost a friend in one of the planes. My mother was flying home from Alaska where my sister was stationed in the Army and instead of changing planes in St Louis, she stayed there while my dad drove out and picked her up (about a 5 or 6 hour drive and one he knows well, since he's from St Louis). My brother sent me an email that said, in its entirety, "holy shit."

labor days and mondays alwayyyyyys get me dowwwwwn

Sorry. Not quite how the song goes, but hey, my brain works in wondrous ways.

I call earworm! Mouhahahhaha!

And besides, I'm not down, so never mind.

Anyway, I just spent a couple of hours playing UNO with my kids. MIL sent a Harry Potter UNO deck. The instructions were in 4 languages, none of them English. Good thing I'm mostly fluent in French, because it's been a long time since I played UNO and the cards don't have words like "skip" or "reverse" or whatever on them, they just have symbols so it took a little interpreting. So anyway, it's a good time. The toddler got up from her nap part way through and I fed her lunch while she watched us play. After that, it was a bit of a struggle to keep her off the table and from grabbing cards, but she finally wandered off to see what Daddy was doing.

We went to the grocery this morning at 9 am. We were out of milk. We got donuts and a bagel and ate before doing the rest of the shopping. They behaved pretty well, which isn't always a given, plus it wasn't crowded, which also helps with the behavior. Beef and bread for dinner tonight.

And that's about it.

I need to work my way through the next chapter here.

Still thinking of my mom

I am guessing her friend's funeral is today. I hope everything went well and without much drama.

And I still am thinking of my English friend who lost her baby.

And yet life goes on. A high school acquaintance and his wife have a new baby. A different English friend posted a pic of her engagement ring. A friend who was staring down the barrel of divorce a couple of months ago has reconciled with her husband and they seem to be working things out. People are going on vacation and coming home having had a good time. A guy I knew in college has a hernia and not cancer.

Lots of love to my mom. Call me when you get home! (She doesn't give out her cell phone number so I can't call her)

PICTURES

I didn't take my camera along to pick blackberries the other day. Yum! I have a big tupperware container in the freezer and made some syrup (was supposed to be jam, but, well...) and we had it on pancakes and just today I used about half of it on a shortcake, which is for dinner. We finished the big bowl of ones I kept just to eat. yum!

Some of these are from just now. The one of my eye was the day after DD almost took my eye out with the antenna from the cordless phone.



DS1


DS2



Um. Yeah.


Yeah.


The cut and bruise 1/2 inch from my eye, due to DD's fabulous throwing skills.


DH brushing his teeth over the sink, like I'm always telling the boys to do. See? Not his computer, no never.

RIP Judy

I heard via my sister that my mom's friend Judy died yesterday at about noon EST.

Lots of love for my mom and for Judy's family and friends.

In memory of a nice, nice woman whose life wasn't easy.

sad news

A UK online friend of mine is separating from her husband. Six kids. It's just so hard to hear. Will everyone be happier apart, how will the kids cope, how will she cope, etc etc.

Another friend's dog had to be put down.

No recent news of the friend whose son has lymphoma and I hope that means good news. They were home after the latest round of treatments and massive side effects.

Another friend's mother has been told that the chemo isn't doing anything. This is the mother who was diagnosed at the same time as my mom's friend, who has been told the same thing.

And Michael Jackson? I don't actually care about him, is that bad?

More about birthday

Also, in the last year, I have gradually been coming to terms with the fact that I will never have another baby. Yes, yes, DD was a surprise and came 5 1/2 years after DS2 and I had a miscarriage in between and I don't actually WANT any more children and after 40 is not a good time for me to have another one, in my opinion, because the risks of problems just keep going up from here. And three kids, that's replacing ourselves plus one. So DH got the snipsnip and now has the all clear. And if - dog forbid - something happened to our marriage or to him and if I ever found another partner in a few years, I would not be having any other children anyway.

But somewhere inside me, I keep looking at my kids, especially the baby, and thinking, "This is it. No more," and I feel old. Yeah, Mom's going to point out again about how I'm not old, but well, this is the end of my fertility. Even if I am technically still fertile though I think I'm on the front end of peri-menopause and have been for a couple of years. I still have a few years - anyone's guess from one to fifteen - before I hit the real thing. It's a bit of a nostalgic look back, I guess you could say.

Heave a deep sigh as I wave bye bye to my ovaries and mourn my empty womb.

Ooooh very dramatic doncha think?

yah yah. I know, Mom.

But I still feel like I'm getting old.

My 40th birthday is tomorrow and it's turning into one of those where I take stock of my life and wonder what's next.

Careers:

BA and MA in French - I can say "would you like fries with that?" in two languages. Four if I stretch and don't mind not really being able to understand the answer. And this was long ago now and I haven't spoken French all that much in ten years. I hear it all the time and I know it would come back.

I don't want to teach. I was a Language Lab Rat both undergrad and grad and I tutored and I never liked it much. Sure, with a good group it is fun and nice and fulfilling, but the good group to groups-that-don't-give-a-rat's-hiney ratio is about 1:10. And the second sort just drain all my joy, a commodity that I get low on anyway.

I worked in a marketing company for a couple years after grad school and before I got married. I started out taking and making calls, sometimes in French, which is why I was hired. After that, I mainly messed with databases and made presentations and did what my manager told me to do and it was much more administrative than marketing. And I took a couple of marketing classes from the community college in Austin and was amazed by the really startlingly common sense stuff that was taught as Amazing! Marketing! Truths! I guess you have to have a knack for schmoozing or something. I'm missing that gene.

I'm a pretty good mom. I yell too much and I don't really know how to motivate my kids and I am a bad example, especially for cleaning. But I think they'll only have a few years of therapy each, not a lifetime. And yeah, it's not a bad job if you can get it, but it doesn't pay much.

I've dabbled in desktop publishing and worked retail for a few years.

I like to read. I live far, far from the big publishing houses, so an editorial assistant job isn't going to just fall in my lap, is it?

And I can write, but not at some brilliant level. And honestly? The vast majority of authors haven't quit their day jobs. It's just not all that lucrative for the vast majority of them. So I need to finish a book and see if I can get it published.

But I need to find a job in the meantime. So... I have no idea.

To be continued...

A few more pictures

Clown car (PICTURES)

(My brilliant musicians)


(My kids, my sister's kids, the neighbor's kids)


(Where's my chauffeur?)


(neighbor's baby - a couple of weeks younger than DD)


(My mom has this dress-up box)


(Yeah. the wig's from that)


(Clown)


And here's the clown car as driven by DD:

Dancing girls make me feel holy

We're home and recovering from the early start yesterday morning (4:15 am) and the long, BORING (at least DS1 thought it was - and told me REPEATEDLY) flights.

We spent one night in the airport hotel so we could catch the 6-whatever am flight from Cincinnati (and BTW, reservations person who couldn't find the Cinci airport hotel: the first shuttle is at 4:30. Not 5. Don't just make stuff up, OK?). We never adjusted to Ohio time completely, so we let the kids wind down for sleep by watching TV - and The Ten Commandments was on ABC. And after 3 hours, it was still only just past the burning bush and we hadn't even gotten to plagues and parting the Red Sea or anything really cool, like, you know, actual commandments. But, there had been dancing girls twice and lots of overacting. I would say that the dancing girls were meant as examples of decadence before Moses found God, but the second group was Jethro's daughters - they were Ishmaelites, apparently, and allegedly worshipped the same god - and M married one of them (the oldest one, who didn't dance for him - he was already feeling holy, having watched her sisters dance, when he went out and proposed to her, though.)

Anyway, lots of, for the lack of a better word, man-titty. Nice legs on the Yul Brenner guy.

It's been a long time since I saw that movie. At almost 4 hours, it's a serious investment of time. And with 10 or 12 or however many it is these days minutes of ads every hour on network TV, I'd have to say epic fail. Get it? Epic? Fail?